Before you ever earned a dollar, you were already learning about money and beginning to write your money story.. You watched how your parents or caregivers paid bills, noticed how they reacted to financial stress, and heard phrases like “money doesn’t grow on trees” or “we can’t afford that.”
Whether you realize it or not, you have a money story, and it started forming when you were around five years old. In fact, many of your beliefs about money have been quietly influencing many of the decisions you make about money: how you spend, save, invest, and even how you feel about success.
The good news? You didn’t write the first draft, but you can rewrite the next one.
What is a Money Story?
Your money story is the emotional and psychological script that shapes your relationship with money. It’s the narrative you’ve built from childhood experiences, cultural norms, and the examples you saw growing up.
You learned these lessons before you even realized it:
- Watching your parents argue about bills OR noticing that they never talked about money at all
- Hearing phrases like “money doesn’t grow on trees” OR “we can’t afford that.”
- Seeing how generosity, saving, or spending was modeled in your home
Whether money was openly discussed or treated as a topic to avoid, those early experiences shaped how you feel about earning, spending, saving, and sharing money today.
For me, one of those early messages was cultural. As a Latina, I grew up hearing that you help family no matter what, even at the expense of your own goals. I took pride in being generous. It felt like love, loyalty, and responsibility all at once. Over time, I realized that constantly giving at the expense of my own goals wasn’t sustainable. My generosity came from a good place, but it was rooted in an old story, one that said self-sacrifice equals love. Rewriting that story meant learning that I can still care for my family and honor my financial boundaries.
These early moments wrote a script about money in your subconscious, one that may still be running your financial life today.
You didn’t choose your early money story, but you’re now the author of what comes next.
Why It’s Important to Uncover Your Money Story
Most of your money beliefs operate on autopilot. They influence your financial habits long before logic enters the picture.
Your money story affects:
- Whether you feel guilty for spending or investing in yourself
- If you avoid checking your accounts out of fear
- How you define security, success, or “enough”
- How much you believe you deserve to earn
In psychology, there’s a concept called the Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) Triangle, which shows how our thoughts, feelings, and actions are interconnected.
Your money story sits at the top of that triangle. It’s the thoughts and beliefs that drive how you feel about money, which in turn shapes what you do with it. When it comes to money, it can play out like this:
The story may have been written when you were just five years old. So ask yourself:
Are you going to continue letting a five-year-old make your financial decisions today?
That child absorbed fear, scarcity, or uncertainty, but the adult you has wisdom, choice, and agency.
Steps to Uncover and Rewrite Your Money Story
Step 1: Reflect on Your Early Influences
Grab a journal or open your notes app and answer these questions:
- What are your earliest memories related to money?
- What money conversations did you hear growing up, or were money conversations avoided?
- How did your family handle financial stress?
- What did you learn about money from your parents or caregivers?
These answers start revealing the invisible money scripts you’ve been following.
Step 2: Notice How the Story Shows Up Now
Your early beliefs didn’t disappear. Next, reflect on how those early beliefs are influencing you today:
- Avoid checking your accounts because it’s uncomfortable?
- Struggle to save even when you can?
- Do you overspend to feel accepted?
- Feel guilty for wanting financial success?
Ask yourself:
- Which beliefs help me reach my goals?
- Which beliefs hinder me?
- What do I want to do differently?
When you can see the connection between your thoughts → feelings → actions, you regain control and the power to make new choices.
Step 3: Rewrite Your Money Story
You are the author now. For each belief that no longer serves you, write a new version that aligns with your goals and the person you’re becoming.
| Old Story | New Story |
| “I’m not good with money.” | “I’m learning to manage money with confidence.” |
| “Money always runs out.” | “I’m creating stability and abundance.” |
| “I have to work twice as hard to be successful.” | “I can earn money with ease and alignment.” |
Reinforce your new story daily:
- Repeat your new beliefs out loud when making money decisions.
- Journal about how they’re showing up in your actions.
- Surround yourself with people and content that reflect the story you’re writing.
Every small action, whether it’s checking your accounts, saving, or setting a boundary, becomes evidence that you’re building a new story.
Final Thoughts
Your money story doesn’t define your future, it explains your past experiences with money. Once you understand it, you can make conscious choices that reflect your values.
Remember: you were handed the first draft, but you hold the pen now.
What’s Next?
Take 10 minutes today to write down three money lessons you learned growing up. Then rewrite each one in a way that supports the financial future you’re creating.
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